Newt Gingrich

In order to motivate myself to exercise more, I’ve decided to donate to Newt Gingrich Rick SantorumMichele Bachmann every day I don’t meet my exercise goals until a Republican candidate is selected for President.

The rules of the challenge:

• For every day I don’t hit 10,000 steps on the fitbit, I’ll donate $1. Update: Based on doctor’s orders, I have to cut back on the daily step count.
• On days I don’t hit 5,000 steps, I’ll donate $5.
• No rollovers. If I do 20,000 steps one day, it doesn’t offset future dates.
• I will publicly shame myself by tweeting and Facebooking when I donate.
• When GingrichSantorumBachmann drops out, she’ll be replaced by the next most repugnant candidate. (Currently Paul.) (Currently Perry Santorum.)

If you want to keep me honest, check my progress on fitbit.

Contributions to date:

$10 in total contributions to Rick Santorum.

• 4/5/2012: $5. Was exhausted due to many late nights working on Groupon stories. I napped from 4p.m. to 11p.m. When I woke up, I started watching the 11 p.m. repeat of Bloomberg West. Totally forgot about fitbit. At 11:50, I raced out and got in as many steps as I could. Sadly, not enough. 4,286.
• 1/27/2012: $5. Forgot that I was a little shy of the mark when I got home. 4,964.

$29 in total contributions to Michele Bachmann.

• 12/29/2011: $5. Dead battery. 2,372.
• 12/26/2011: $5. Redeye, family time. 2,527.
• 12/5/2011: $1. Sick. 5,348.
• 11/28/2011: $1. Sick. 5,204.
• 11/22/2011: $5. Sick. 627.
• 11/19/2011: $1. Sick. 7,332.
• 11/8/2011: $5. Yuck. First $5 day. Was exhausted when I came home and couldn’t do it.
• 11/7/2011: $1. Technicality. Forgot to wear fitbit while working out.
• 11/6/2011: $1. Technicality. For some reason, end of DST screwed up fitbit’s tracking.
• 11/1/2011: $1. Was a long day.
• 10/19/2011: $1. Missed target by 57 steps because workout finished after midnight.
• 10/17/2011: $1. Missed target because workout finished after midnight. If you count the part after midnight, I did hit the 10k.
• 10/5/2011: Missed target after Steve Jobs’ death. Due to special circumstances, $99 will be donated to LiveStrong instead.
• 10/2/2011: Test donation of $1.

Some reminders of why Michele Bachmann:

• She apparently thinks Libya is not in Africa. “The president, he put us in Libya. He is now putting us in Africa.”

Feel free to help motivate me by sending your Michele Bachmann quotes: batshitcrazy@agrawals.org. There have to be at least many Michele Bachmann gaffes as there are disgruntled Groupon merchants.